Obviously I am a procrastinating bastard, with how slow I am knocking the remainder of these "100 things" out, but I will be more prompt abut it in the next week or so. Here is 26-50
26. I have had my dreadlocks for 10 years
27. and hate it when someone pulls them, asks me a dumb question about them, or characterizes them as "braids"
28. I once punched a old man, knocking him the fuck out.
29. Granted, he wasn't that old, and he did pull a knife on me, but still.
30. I also once had sex in a bathroom during a wake.
31. I cursed out a preacher as well, but that fucker deserved it though.
32. I once held a midget by his ankles, and threatened to toss him "like a Frisbee" if he didn't "shut his fucking mouth"
33. I once tried to fight 4 people at the same time, and got my ass handed to me like having a picnic with Jeffrey Dahmer.
34. but, good or bad, it gained me the reputation of a "psychopath"
35. As food goes, I have a thing for macaroni and cheese, french fries, and crab-legs.(served separately)
36. The only food I can't fuck with is bananas.
37. I hate ghetto gospel plays.
38. and any other black author, blogger, you name it, who has to "coon it up" to find an audience.
39. I am a fan of the Chicago Bears.
40. I am also a Lakers fan, and a extreme apologist of Kobe Bryant.
41. To the point that I think that most black folks who don't like him have been brainwashed by the "racist media".
42. When I met Kobe I told him that I constantly defend him, and that Shaq was a "bitch masquerading as a 7 foot mild dud" He laughed and gave me a pound.
43. I love all parts of a woman, but I am a tit man.
44. My mother says it's because I was breast fed, which makes me nauseous just thinking about that.
45. It is to the point that I talk about it openly, so when I talked about a woman having "a rack" some lady thought I said "Iraq". I pointed out that there were similarities between the two because I stared at her chest and said that I wouldn't mind "liberating those motherfuckers", that I would "spend a shitload of money to stay there", and that "pulling out would be the wrong option".
46. But if I get to see those beautiful scoops of flesh up close, I love bumping uglies to the sounds of Sade.
47. I once contemplated suicide
48. but thought against it because I realized that I don't follow through on things anyways.
49. I'm not sure if he heard me, probably not, but I once screamed "you fucking cock-smoker!!" at a limousine that I thought to be President Bush's a couple of years back
50. My therapist told me that I was a sex addict, and when I asked her how she knew, she went into a lengthy psycho-babble spiel. I looked confused, then she said, "Plus dude, you tried to hit on me!!!"