Tuesday, November 01, 2005

HumanityCritic tackles some important issues, kind of..

For the past few months I have been corresponding with a brilliant young woman out of New Jersey named Maria. Being that she is 17 years old I was hesitant to engage in an intellectual back and forth with her, not because she isn't up to it, but in the age of on-line pedophiles and the time I accidentally browsed some "barely legal" porn a while back, a brother has to watch his step. But, because I am a punk, and will basically give you my social security number if you say that you "like my blog", I began to correspond with this teenager in question.(Even though, at the end of each of my emails I would have a tag-line saying, "I'm not a sexual deviant! How could I, I have a crush on Janeane Garofalo for Christs sake!!" I know, my paranoid ass.) Anyway, Maria is just getting through a 2 year battle with cancer, so not only do I admire her brilliant young mind but also a courageousness that I will never know.

A few weeks ago Maria posed some ultra serious questions to me concerning a wide range of social issues. I've been so caught up in my own daily minutiae that I haven't been able to get to it, until day. So Maria, I am putting you on "Blast", this is for you.(Well, it isn't a total surprise since I asked your permisssion, but you get the point.) So the following post is a collection of my social views, posed in question form by a young lady, for the record, that I am not intimately involved with!!!! Some of my answers will piss people off, and I know that there will be scores of people who disagree with me and find this post "unfunny", but I didn't start this blog or live my life to be "safe" or "predictable". So fuck it, here ya go.

How do you feel about Interracial Dating?: Like many things in life, I feel that people should be able to do what they want to do. I mean, why do you care who people chose to date. I remember a friend of mine in High School tried his best to date a chick named Keisha who not only turned him down but publicly ridiculed him in the process. So you can imagine my amazement when my friend started dating a person of another race, and Keisha got all upset like my friend betrayed her. What the fuck is that about? My brother-in-law is a white man, and when he planned on marrying my sister I told him that if he fucked up I would "beat him to death with a bag of sodas" and "bury his ass in the middle of a motherfucking desert". But then again, it wasn't because he was white, I would have said that to any asshole planning to marry my sister to be totally honest. The other day my friend Calvin asked me why I hadn't really dated outside my race and I gave him this answer: "It isn't based on race, I don't want to be the one to ruin the myth!!" Calvin said, "What do you mean??" I said, " I would hate to hear some woman point at my genitalia and scream, "The myth isn't true!! You mean my family stopped talking to me because of THAT!!!"

What's you take on Abortion?: Wow Maria, this is probably the paragraph where people stop reading my blog, but no guts no glory they say. For anyone who is pro-choice, the misconception is that you somehow are "Pro-abortion" which is totally different. As a man, I feel funny even talking about this because I think that the male species should stay out of women's vagina's. For people who are religious and are anti-abortion, I understand your stance, but I just can never fully understand people caring so much about other people's genitalia. If Abortion was to one day be outlawed, it would be like it was back in the day when it was only available to the rich, and you would see a bunch of back-alley abortion places popping up. I guess my beliefs strengthened in college, when I knew a guy who was a hardcore anti-abortion activist that ended up bombing a clinic and killing 5 people.(Kind of throws a monkey wrench in the whole "cherishing life" argument.) But then again, like Scooter Libby talking to a reporter, I think I've said to much.

What do you hate black conservatives so much?: Primarily because the are used as "props" for other republicans as a sign of the parties "Diversity" and it is kind of sickening. The same way a few years back when Fuzzy Zoeller made those racist statements about Tiger Woods eating "chicken and watermelon", to prove that he wasn't racist he carted out a black guy he called his "friend". Or this one time when I was switching channels and saw a black conservative woman on Bill O'Reilly's show discussing the negative effects of Hip Hop. This lady could have had legitimate arguments concerning the negativity in Hip Hop, but while she was agreeing with Bill like a house pet, she failed to understand that he was coming from a entirely different place in his "critiques" of said artform. Some people will say, "The Democrats aren't that great when it comes to black people as well, they take black folks for granted." Maybe so, but it is like being in jail and having the choice of two jailhouse roommates, one that occasionally puts his arm around you in a uncomfortable way, or one that wants to anaaly rape you. Both are fucked up, but god dammit there is a difference!! I have tried to understand the black conservative, hearing their explanation for being one because they like "smaller government" and hate "tax and spend democrats". Well guess what Tom(as in Uncle), this administration isn't "small" and these assholes are "taxing and spending" like a motherfucker!! So why are you a black conservative again? I kind of feel sorry for them though, because like the House negro who sings the praises of their master even though they are mistreated, or the battered housewife that is too scared to leave her husband and makes excuses for his sorry ass, it's all a shame.

What are your thoughts on Gay Marriage?: Again, why should I care what two people want to do with their lives. I know you have heard the same tired bullshit, "But they are sacrificing the sanctity of marriage!" Give me a fucking break, with the current divorce rates and television shows like "What silly ninny shithead wants to Marry my Dad?", the "sanctity of marriage" is unintentionally funny like Lil Kim's performance in "You got Served!!" Not to go off on a tangent here, but the "gay" issue was the main reason why more black folks voted for Bush this time, and all those "sweaty fucking preachers" endorsed that "Asshat in Chief". Their sermons probably went like this: "Ladies and Gentleman of this fine church, I know that many of you are struggling financially. Many of you have loved ones in Iraq, can't pay your bills, and all the programs that this president is cutting is pretty deplorable. Oh yeah, he is also like the worst environmental president by the way. But you vote for him for one reason, because if you don't ALL THE QUEERS WILL GET MARRIED!! AHHHHHHHH!!!!" I suddenly feel like Lawrence Fishburn in "School Daze", People "Wake Uuuuup!!"

This should be good, How do you feel about George W. Bush?: Maria, the man is a pair of fucking clown shoes to be totally honest. One of his first speeches, referencing the outgoing Clinton administration, he said that he would "usher in an era of personal responsibility." What a joke that he turned out to be, since the guy lacks the "minerals" to take responsibility for anything that has gone wrong so far. It's kind of funny when you think about the past couple of years, Katrina, gay Escort Jeff Gannon, a badly going war, Harriet Miers, Tom Delay, soaring gas prices, leaking of a C.I .A agents name, "Scooter" Libby, and a plethora of other shit. Then it gets even funnier when you think of all the bullshit fed to the public from this White House, "John Kerry looks french", "Either you're with us or against us", "Freedom Fries", "He was for it before he was against it", the Swift-boat vets, and whatever vomit inducing drivel you could rattle off. You know you are a world class fuck up when you have nut-bags like Ann Coulter and Pat Buchanan coming out against you.

56 comments:

Amadeo said...

Good thing, good things...My question is if you could throat chop any 3 people who would they be?

chele said...

Thanks HC. These are important issues--glad you responded the way you did.

blainethemono said...

Jesus Christ! Finally an island of hope in a sea of shitty blogs. And who gives a fuck how pissed the squares get? Their glass palaces need to be stoned.

Nova said...

Great damn post man. I've gotta say, even though I tend to be a political moderate, I agree with you on all counts here. (puts on my Humanity Critic Fan Club t-shirt)

CaffeineDiva said...

Kind of throws a monkey wrench in the whole "cherishing life" argument...
Tell me about it!
Great post.
Still a fan!

Miz JJ said...

Interesting post. I love the post about the preacher endorsing Bush...lol!

Maverick said...

Good stuff, HC...you know I can appreciate when people highlight the political stuff. And thanks for stopping by the blog...

totolehero said...

so, do you hate all christians ?

Jackson said...

I actually think she threw you a nice and easy lob pitch. While you definitely didn't hit a foul ball, you didn't exactly hit it out of the park either.

Luckily based were loaded so you did score some runners home. ;)

Luke Cage said...

Nice rhethoric friend. Obviously, you and Maria must have gone quite a few rounds of e-mails to get to the Q&A portion of this blog. And glad to hear that she gave her Cancer hell! Kudos to her for that.

Did you hear the collective "ooohs" and "aaahs" as the question How do you feel about George W. Bush came up? I smacked my hands together like I was Denzel Washington in Training Day when he reacted to Ethan Hawke's admission to being paired up with a female officer. His reaction was like mine. Oh man, this ought to be great! -lol

damion said...

couldn't agree more!

paco said...

YAY GAY MARRIAGE!!!

indigo said...

i'm agreeing w/ u for the most part. i'm half black and half asian so i think interracial dating is inevitable in a lot of ways. i'm anti abortion but pro choice, b/c back alley abortions are horrible. gay marriage: y not?

~indigo

bucknips said...

I'm totally there with your opinions. Your statement on gay marriage is one of the most honest and intelligent I yet to hear. Thanks man!

Knockout Zed said...

This is the reason I don't do political posts. I can't do them justice. Kudos, my man.

GWB can "freedom" kiss my dick!

KZ

glory said...

i appreciate your guts and honesty and find that i agree with you a lot...

Inside Man said...

great post, and cheers for being honest

Sparkling said...

Live and let live

Brando said...

HC, the poltical stuff was good, but I got an especially good LOL at the "I don't want to ruin the myth" line. I heard Clevon Little echoing in my head: Baby, please, I am not from Havana!

I also think, since Bush is known for misspeaking, that he meant to usher in the era of personal irresponsibility.

miyna said...

i agree with basically everything you said here, especially that 'gay marriage' issue. marriage is supposed to be about love and commitment, and surmounting life's little obstacles together. gay people have it tough in society, even today, when they have more 'rights' than they used to 5-10 years ago. if they are willing to put up with the BS they get from damn near everyone for getting married, or even from being together, then i say that's commitment. let 'em get married.

okay, i have no comment on the George W. thing, not because i don't agree - actually, i do - but because my tired ass had to go look up 'clown shoes'. i've been web searching and asking questions on that shit for a month trying to figure it out.

shut up.

ManNMotion said...

I'll respecfully disagree with about 60% of what you said, and about 35% of your logic, but I understand where you are coming from.

AndyT13 said...

Very entertaining blog. I read several of your posts and laughed quite a bit. Good work. I should try to make mine mre interesting and amusing but I'm too lazy and self centered to even try. :-)Thanks for the comment BTW.
Peace.

LilySea said...

"'The myth isn't true!! You mean my family stopped talking to me because of THAT!!!'"

hahahahahahaha!!!!!!

Love it, love it. Thanks for stopping by mine. Yours is cool too.

Me said...

bag of sodas tee hee.. I haven't said hi in a long time, so, "hey." But imagine my audacity -- out of all that serious shit you just gave us, all I can think of is, "Why the hell don't you correspond with me?" Boo. Hiss!

**RPM** said...

Maybe I've had too much wine, but I'm cheesin at you answering these questions and showing Maria some wholesome (and non porn-like) love.

Cheers to you HC.

Andrea said...

Ahhhhh
your answers are like a breath of fresh air.

Justin said...

"minerals?" Been watching "Snatch" lately?

Hopluv said...

I agree with you on all accords!

David said...

HC, I salute you for speaking your mind on some controversial issues, which I happen to agree on, btw! So far, in my blog I have pretty much steered clear of controversy. Now, you have got me thinking of weighing in on a few things!

Chubby Chocolate said...

I love you.

elvira black said...

You are awesome! And as far as THE myth...don't burst my freakin' bubble, ok?

HOW said...

HC-
Found you blog via your comment, and could not stop reading! Your points of view and delightful use of words had me giggling like a school girl. . .the woman I am working with kept giving me "the look"! I will most definately be back! Thanks for stopping by!
HOW

Tinker said...

So true all these things. The post on the black conservatives, I have to agree on most points. The ironic thing about that is I am dating a black conservative...staunch! Life is not always a bowl of cherries with his political views. Can we say "tune out"...this sometimes happens when the "I love Bush" aura that surrounds him gets to be toooo much!

rhein said...

i likes the way you think.

BlueAngel said...

Wonderful...

I'm waiting on your response to Amadeo's question.

lady in satin said...

Its funny that you say that about black conservatives. Although I agree with you 100%. Anyway, I got this site from a message board that I'm apart of and I don't know how legit it is, but you all can check it out. If it is legit, I think its crazy.

http://www.rent-a-negro.com/

J & J said...

Rockin post.

About the conservatives, a friend of mine once said "The fastest way for a minority to move up the political ladder is to affiliate yourself with a right-wing platform. The party will speed your flag bearing ass through the ranks so fast, next thing you know, you're on the cabinet...The only problem is, you'll be stuck with a right wing platform."

Ahh, politics.:p

Ms. J

q.B said...

As soon as a read your comment about interracial relationships my militant gene kicked in. Two reasons why I question interracial couples. 1) The boy being dissed by the black girl, so he turned to the white person for acceptance (that's not love, that's low self esteem). 2) the daddy long legs myth (the white girls don't have love, they just want their fantasies fulfilled). But at the end of the day adults are free to do whatever they like.

IsLifeLame said...

Hey HC, thought you might find this a good read if you haven't seen it all ready.

http://www.washingtontimes.com/metro/20051101-104932-4054r.htm

Jez Chill said...

Wow, you and Maria touched on some hot topics! Are you sure she's not interviewing you for the school paper?

Brotha Buck said...

Can I respectfully disagree with Critic and not retain a throat chop. My neck is the one think on my body I still kinda like. I think blacks need to be a part of both parties. Blacks for so long have sold their souls to democrats, and democrats continue to do nothing for us. Now the party has become so fruity, they can't win elections because nobody can relate to their values but kooks, weirdos and uh, mostly black folk. With a growing GROWING hispanic population, most of which vote republican, soon, neither party will feel any obligation to blacks because we've put our eggs into one big democrat basket.

*holding my neck*

That Girl Tam said...

I stumbled onto your page from someone else's page that I tend to troll. Today you've instantly become one of my favorites!

Not only were your answers smart, but they were honest and real. I agree 100% with every answer you gave.

Thank you for bringing a breath of fresh air to the rest of us! THANKS MARIA FOR ASKING THE RIGHT QUESTIONS!

Running2Ks said...

How many times do you think I can nod up and down in agreement without my neck snapping off?

I *heart* your responses.

Georgiapeach said...

You never cease to amaze me. Why don't you ever stop by my blog and say hi. I am always coming over here. I know that I adore the rap music you hate..lol :).

Brother OMi said...

i FEEL you on the abortion issue, a man should have no say so on what a women does to her body. I don't like it but i can't say anything

i think we should focus more on self control then birth control as common puts it.

i like your take on interracial dating.

I think both parties are wack if you ask me.

politics is local..

Brother OMi said...

by the way,
the growing hispanic population does NOT predominantly vote republican. A good number do as compared to blacks but most vote democratic and run as democratic candidates.

Don Tate II said...

Oops, I was wrong — but still...

http://www.usatoday.com/news/politicselections/2004-11-10-hispanic-voters_x.htm

~b*b~ said...

so hc you honestly "think that the male species should stay out of women's vagina's(sic)" - so what you're telling us is that your're anti-intercourse and pro-masturbation (lol)

you are a brave man though - props to maria!

Richard said...

Great Post, HC! :)

Oliviasmommi said...

Well, you already know that we are on the same page on all of these issues, but I can not say that I am as frustrated with Black Conservatives as you...being that I am white, I guess my tolerance level is a little better than yours where that is concerned. But, in my mind, a Black Republican makes about as much sense as a Gay Republican, but then again I could question Female Republicans, Low-Income Republicans, Elderly Republicans, Hispanic Republicans, etc. etc. etc...I just do not understand the appeal!

Oliviasmommi said...

And, Oh, BTW...the myth is NOT true, Chocolate comes in all shapes and sizes, just like Vanilla...and contrary to popular opinion, once you go black you can go back...and...no, not all white chicks are looking for Mandingo. *wink*

Nia said...

Myth my ass...I've had dark chocolate 6'2 niggas whip out what I'd like to affectionately label "time wasters." As in I just spent the last 3 months getting to know you for that!!! Although they were in the minority and I've never dated outside my race so I'm not exactly an expert on the subject.

I'm sure the folks in Iraq were estatic with the preachers at home claiming Kerry was the devil. *sigh*

Jdid said...

who cares who gets upset just speak your piece guy

brooklyn babe said...

Like how you spit it, and Amadeo is a nut!
-Bk Babe

kozmic_cocoa said...

No, the myth isn't true. The most well endowed man I've been with was white and the second least endowed was a 6'4" black man who wore a size 13 shoe. Trust me when I say it's about the hands not the feet.
Anyway, great post. I totally agree with everything. I think in regards to the interracial dating issue, sista's are getting mad because black men especially black men with money and status seem to prefer white women. It's hard when you see a good-looking brotha with a very UNIMPRESSIVE white woman. I've also heard black men say things like, "black women don't keep themselves up as well as white women." or "black women talk too much noise." That's the only issue I have with interracial dating. If it is just two people who happen to dig each other that's one thing, but when it is a preference based on stereotype its another.

Fender-Kel said...

HC Marry me :) or add me to msn at least. I'm shopaholic_chic@hotmail.com
or this is my blog http://spaces.msn.com/members/angeltears13/PersonalSpace.aspx?_c=
just copy it into a url.