Friday, May 19, 2006
It's official, I want to get drunk with Kiefer Sutherland
Besides being a jovial drunk, also one that contemplates getting intimate with women that I hardly know when I've had a few too many but don't because of my germaphobia, I'm also proud of one of my other inebriated idiosyncrasies. Fessing up to idiotic drunken behavior and not hiding behind the old "I don't remember" defense. When I punched my friend Steven's cousin in the mouth because he was talking shit, even though I was told early on to ignore him because he was schizophrenic, the next day I apologized for decking a guy who should have been in a padded room. When I was hanging out with one of the only ex-girlfriends who I am friends with and her new boyfriend, I drunkenly found myself attempting to inappropriately compare sex stories in a "does she still do that thing with her tongue" kind of way, I apologized the next day for my obvious indiscretion. When my friend made the mistake of having me watch his house while he was on vacation, one drunken evening I got the idea to empty his pool and skate the fuck out of it all night. Even though it was fun, there was a significant amount of damage so I apologized and payed a monetary sum.
That is why the footage of Kiefer Sutherland tackling a Christmas Tree in the documentary "I Trust You to Kill Me" is so refreshing. Not because it is evident that even Hollywood celebrities can act like drunken assholes, but because Sutherland doesn't hide from it, he even laughs about it and doesn't try to cover it up like most celebs. I have to admit though, being the huge fan of "24" that I am, I can just imagine Jack Bauer saying, "Santa, your ass is going down!!" pre-Christmas Tree tackle.